Sorry for Last Year

It’s all my fault

I’m sorry. I’m soooo sorry. Everything in the country, in society, in the entire universe is in such a terrible state right now, and it seems to just get worse all the time. So on behalf of me, I sincerely and deeply apologize. Because it is clearly my fault.

The Accident

Way back in 2019 (remember that year? Remember how exciting it was, when we could do things like leave our house, meet friends, or go to work? Oh, those carefree days of our youth), I had a freak biking accident. I’d like to say that I was flying down a windy coastal highway and slid into an epic crash while braking hard to avoid hitting an animal. Or that I went sailing over the handlebars and into a ravine while mountain biking. Or even that I was side-swiped by an aggressive and bike-blind driver on a busy Silicon Valley street. But the reality is much less exciting.

The Hospital

They quickly zipped me over to the nearest hospital to check up on things like whether I broke my neck (nope) or spine (nope) or anything else (nope), but there fortunately wasn’t anything major wrong, just various bangs and scrapes which you’d expect to get on a short, quick journey from a bike onto asphalt. They kept me in the trauma unit overnight, running various tests, all of which were normal.

Side Note: The U.S. Healthcare System is the Best in the World. Except for Everywhere Else in the World.

I’ve heard politicians claim that we have the best healthcare system in the world. And for sure, we have some great experts, technology, and facilities. But I learned a major lesson about exactly how awesome the U.S. healthcare system is from my short visit.

24 hours of care = $102,000

$102,000! Plus another $3,700 for the five-mile ambulance ride. This amount would surely bankrupt many (most?) people, and it’s ludicrous that it’s considered an appropriate charge for one day of any kind of care, unless that care is accompanied by gourmet food, a beautiful room, impeccable service, and someone handing you $100k in cash.

Recovery

After that fun and ridiculously expensive overnight stay, I returned home to recover, which didn’t take long. Besides a few bruises, I was really fine, and returned to work almost immediately. The only real change to my lifestyle is that I now stay more hydrated (or at least feel really guilty when I don’t, which is probably good enough).

The World Spirals Down Into the Abyss

Since my accident, we have all watched the world go from one crisis to the next, piling calamity onto calamity until it seems like it can’t get any worse… and yet it always does. It’s like body aches and pains; some problems never go away, they just become less critical as other issues become more pressing.

And It’s All My Fault

Take a step back and look at everything that’s happened in the past year. I think it’s clear that 2020 was a hallmark year, unparalleled in history for the sheer amount of social, political, and natural disasters.

Wait, What? A Bike Accident?

Well, yes and no. I’m not saying that my bike accident caused all of these freak situations in the world. Or that I caused these problems directly.

So Then

So if I didn’t wake up, maybe it’s all okay. Even though I am saddened by and struggling with all of these world calamities, and seeing all of you struggle right along with me, it’s fine. Because it is all just happening in my own mind. It’s just some movie I’m watching on Netflix that probably has a happy ending, eventually.

Android and comedy. Not necessarily in that order.

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